“I woke up this morning, looked into the mirror and loved everything about myself. I am content with my life and I am happy every day”, said no one ever! You don’t have to love everything about yourself but in order to pursue your purpose in life, you need to accept yourself for who you are.
Self acceptance often times goes against what our ego and emotions are trying to tell us. The key is to love yourself more every day for what you bring into the world, acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses and try putting one foot in front of the other into the right direction. Even if the act of loving yourself is a 1 minute ritual each day, it has the power to switch your mindset over time.
LOVE YOURSELF MORE
I’ve been inspired by a few conversations recently that I had with girlfriends and also with some of my clients around this topic. It seems to me that more than ever we are looking towards outside world validation and measuring our worth based on feedback by others.
I liken it to a drug – you are on a high only as long as the effects of the drug last and then you have to go out there and seek the validation again. This can manifest in the form of another social media post, attention seeking with friends or family or going back to the gym because you don’t think an hour a day exercise is enough. These are just a few examples of obsessive behaviours but there are countless more. You will only know what your ‘drug’ is if you care to examine your habits.
To love yourself more doesn’t mean to obsess about yourself more… Of course aiming to better yourself is important but having a healthy mindset is the corner stone of a healthy foundation.
THE DANGER WITH LABELS
We are very quick to label people: she is skinny, she is fat, she is pretty, she is ugly, she is interesting, she is successful, she is… you get my point. I recently watched an interesting panel discussion titled: ‘Hack live on body obsession’ and I must admit I felt quite shocked by people’s motivation for wanting to look a particular way.
If you are in Australia, you will be able to access this episode on abc iview via this link – the panel included Ashy Bines, a gentleman who is a selfie star on Instagram, an adult industry worker who is obsessed with plastic surgery, a couple of ladies who have/had an eating disorder (like anorexia and bulimia), a couple of body builders and also experts like a psychologist, a GP and Christine Morgan, CEO of the Butterfly Foundation.
I must admit I haven’t really been exposed to the topic of body dismorphia before and it wasn’t until recently that I started looking into it a bit more.
I was in particularly inspired by the bravery and honesty of my fellow coach friend, Jenny Orenstein who spoke up about her own eating disorder at an event we both attended recently. She is raising awareness about this dangerous mindset driven disease as an ambassador of the Butterfly foundation. Watch her heartfelt video here.
3 SIMPLE STEPS TOWARDS A SELF LOVING MINDSET
I recorded another introductory video for you, this time for the theme of ‘love yourself more’ and in this 4 minute short clip I share my 3 tips that helped me foster a more self loving mindset:
(1) Notice your thoughts without judgment
We all have countless amounts of thoughts every day. Some will be positive, some negative and some just straight up sabotaging. Being able to identify your thoughts without judging yourself in the process of having them is extremely important. What this practice will teach you is that you are not your thoughts.
(2) Break the pattern of negative and self sabotaging thoughts
Finding a nice little nifty word that you can call out (loud or not) for yourself to break the spiral of negative thoughts is my second suggestion. Mine is ‘bullshit’ and let me tell you, it works wonders every time… I literally call ‘BS’ on my own negative self talk and stop the thoughts ‘getting to me’ and making me feel like crap. Once the thoughts affected your emotional status, the work is that much harder to undo.
(3) Exercise self compassion
If however you have fallen into the trap of self sabotage and allowed your heart to internalise these thoughts to make you feel all kinds of ‘yuck’ then I recommend exercising self compassion. Place yourself into a situation where you felt compassionnate in the past towards someone you really love. Find the courage to do exactly the same towards yourself – almost like having a dialog with yourself in a loving and non-judgmental way. If tears, anger or frustration surface, just allow yourself to feel them. Releasing negative emotions and beliefs is cathartic. You don’t want to carry the memory of these in your body only to have to deal with them at a later stage.
I’d like to encourage you to download the latest colouring sheet and think about the ways you can love yourself more. The affirmation and quote is here to inspire you to tap into your inner wisdom and creativity and forge a path that’s yours and (uniquely) yours alone.
If you haven’t joined the program yet, you can do so by opting in via this form – it’s also the way you can download the colouring sheet:
If you’ve got a story to share in the comings days/weeks/months, please do so by leaving us a comment. Looking forward to reading your tips on loving yourself more.
Lots of love,
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